If you didn't catch last night's Apprentice, but want a play by play of how ridiculous Maria was, this recap at tvgasm is hilarious. The highlight is the last picture with Maria looking like she might finally kill Wes in the cab.

(link courtesy of too much free time)

Why is it that any face that appears mysteriously must be the Virgin Mary? I saw CNN's picture of the infamous ebay cheese sandwich and thought, "that looks like some classic Hollywood star, like Marlene Dietrich." What's freaky is I can't say I've ever seen Marlene Dietrich before, but her name just came to mind. Then I found this picture of her, and the grilled cheese image is remarkably similar. Now that's mysterious.
There might be a better match in this Silverscreen Sirens gallery, if you care to look. All I'm saying is Our Lady of the Grilled Cheese may be a classic movie star, and the folks bidding on a half-eaten cheese sandwich may be crazy.

Personally, I can suspend disbelief and really enjoy a movie like The Day After Tomorrow, but if you're one of those poor souls who is tormented by the implausible-- the Insultingly Stupid Movie Physics rating system is for you. In their system, The Day After Tomorrow was rated RP for "retch". Apparently it was saved from an XP rating ("Obviously physics from an unknown universe") for being guilty more of exaggeration than total nonsense.

Kick ass: An unlicensed teenager who's seen too many action movies tries to flee a hit-and-run scene, only to meet up with some concrete company employees who've seen too many action movies... and have big trucks. Awesome.

(courtesy of FARK)

I know I seem indiscriminate when it comes to movies (and I really am), but I just watched Mean Girls and really liked it. Tina Fey's screenplay totally caught the essence of high school life and the message was nice even though it strayed slightly into the cheese-zone. All of the SNL bit parts were so fab (the permissive boob job mom, the clueless parents, etc).
Maybe I was especially connected to the storyline because some of us can relate to having middle school lesbian rumors dog us through high school (and some of us can still feel the undying hatred for some of the perpetrators.) I'm not saying it was me, but... okay, we all know it was me.

I'm a big fan of compact, novel living spaces, but the snail shell system takes it a little too far.

"Fixed to this is a box which contains equipment for cooking, a container for drinking water, a torch, a sponge for removal of condensed water, and a tube which can be fixed to the bilge pump. When the box is emptied of these items, plastic bags can be fixed to the box, which then functions as a toilet seat."

When you say "just remove all the stuff from your equipment box and it can double as a toilet", I say "sir, you've gone too far." Give me a loft cube any day.

(link via j-walk)

Update: hold the phone, this guy has more. Apparently he went a little crazy in the plastic tubs department at lowe's and started an "inventing" hobby. He also has no problem with dual-functionality-- even if one of the functions is going potty. Personally, I'll use things for double duty, but a toilet is a toilet.

Bar Mobile--I guess the passenger-seat-toilet is only popular after many, many drinks have been distributed.

The space frame looks a little more habitable than the snail shell, but this one is for a family.... not my family.

Oooooh, no- the hygeine tubs take the cake (and look at the dude using it!!)
(scroll to the bottom, too-- hygeine discotheque!)

I was wondering where the double-duty toilet was for the space frame, but I think a hygeine tub will do.

A few opinions:

Confessions of an Ugly Stepsister is better than Wicked.

Raj being fired is better than Kevin being fired.

Regency House Party is better than other reality dating shows.

Happy, funny things:
quote:

"come dinosaur, we're not welcome in the house of no imagination." - Phoebe

museum: Mr Rogers museum- where you can actually change into a cardigan while you sing the song!

weird reality tv: Regency House Party

Avril speaks out against lip-synching
What's interesting about this article is I can aver that when I saw Avril live last year (as escort to my little sister, of course) she was most definitely live. So live she sang every song off key. She was flat the whole time. I would've paid good money for her to use a support track, or whatever Ashlee claims to have been using. This made me giggle:
"I got signed because of my voice... And I've never lip-synced once."

Oh, how I wish you would.

Just to amuse:
From an NYT article on the content of discarded grocery lists--

"People send messages to one another, too. Buried in one list is this statement: ''If you buy more rice, I'll punch you.'' And plenty of shoppers, like the one with both ice cream and diet pills on the list, reveal their vices."

This map from CNN proves what I'd heard about the presidential campaign ads- living in a swing state sucks. I'm so sick of the mudslinging ads. I voted already, leave me alone! No matter what happens on Tuesday, at least the ads will go away.

I'm filing this away for future use:
Chandler: Oh really? You think you’re stronger? Why don’t you prove it?
Ross: Oh, I’ll prove it, I’ll prove it like a theorem!!!

(the whole script)

Yay! Halloween fun-- carve a pumpkin.

(link courtesy of Metafilter)


Where you from?
I'm from Iowa.
I was in Atlanta once.
Iowa's not in the south. You know that, right?
No, I didn't.

As part of my week-without-cable/watching-DVDs-from-the-library extravanganza, I just enjoyed Sidewalks of New York. I'm still in love with Garden State, but I really enjoyed this movie. One, for Rosario Dawson and Heather Graham and a fun mish-mash of recognizable, b-list faces; two, for David Krumholtz singing a Pete Yorn song (I rediscovered his album recently); and three, for the reference (above) to Iowa (I feel like I'm in an exclusive "I know where Iowa is" club). Why do I have this obsession with anything that's exclusive? Maybe it's a middle child thing, to want to be unique. But this is about the movie, not my fixations. Good movie.

I almost posted a love note to Garden State last night, but I decided to wait and see how I felt today. I still love it and I finally understand what people mean when a song or movie 'changed their life' (it didn't really change my life, but it gave me that feeling). I know it's not cool to love a movie that everyone else loves and I try not to be seduced into thinking that these almost mainstream movies count as cool and independent, but I loved Lost in Translation, LOVED Secretary, and am head over heels for Garden State.

Now, I'm not saying you should go see it, because I like to feel that this movie now belongs to me, but if you like my kind of movies and can go and enjoy it without telling me about it, you might be better for it.

More halloween song fun, thanks to Laura:

Five little pumpkins sitting on a gate
The first one said, "Oh my, it's getting late"
The second one said, "There are witches in the air"
The third one said,"But we don't care!"
The fourth one said, "Let's run and run and run"
The fifth one said, "I'm ready for some fun!"
Wooooo, went the wind
And out went the light
And the five little pumpkins rolled out of sight.

Personally, I think it's tragically sweet of Martha Stewart to pick crab apples and cook up jelly in prison. However, I'm confused by the story... what's not allowed? picking crab apples or cooking or cooking what you've gathered? How did she get to use the kitchen at all if it's not allowed? I say, let her make jam.

I'm not sure I've linked this before, but I have been regularly checking Tricks of the Trade for updates. There was an article in the Morning News that was very popular- so the author, Matthew (aka Defective Yeti) spun it out into this website, where he's collecting more tips so he can create a book. Each one is a little slice of genius. I just hope I can put one of these tricks to use some day.

The power of the internet-- I was just cruising the AHS Homecoming pictures posted on tufools.net, hoping on the outside chance to spot my sister in her supposedly very un-Rebecca dress. Lo and behold, there she is, twice. The world just got a little smaller. And that better be soda in those solo cups, or I've got blackmail material.

Standard procedure or freakishly friendly midwesterners?
I went to Buckle for the first time today (apparently, they're all over- including the ATL, but not at my malls). It was cool, and I got a neat jacket, but the sales people kind of freaked me out. The minute I walked in, one of the sales guys complimented my shirt -- because he had one too (a Walmart-bought Wonder Bread shirt-- go figure). Then I picked up the jacket, and another sales guy brought over a sweater which he thought I might like since I liked the jacket. Then a sales girl said that she had bought the same jacket, and paired it with pink and it was cute. Then when I got a fitting room, the sales guy got my name and proceeded to address me by name the whole time I was in the store, and suggest stuff and point out sales.
So, are they working on commission, really motivated sales people, or just freakishly, midwestern nice? The Iowans freak me out sometimes with the niceness, but I don't want to assume.